In 2008, a year after Karley was born (baby #3), I hit my all time high on the scale; 263lbs. I hadn't really paid attention to my weight. I was focused on my kids so much during the day that I forgot about ME. There was other stress going on my life; financial losses, rocky marriage, and little help from anyone because we lived so far from everybody. I calmed my emotions with oreos and potato chips at night. I started to feel too tired to do anything. I was pulling straight A's in college, pretty much raising the kids on my own, plus working full time. But my physical activity level was pretty minimal.
I remember the day I decided I needed to make a change. I got home from a long day at work, had a short period of time to feed, bath, and get the kids in bed so I could work on an essay. I grabbed a pizza on the way home. The kids sat at the table eating pizza, I sat with a bag of chips-a-hoy cookies. Kally (my oldest) asked me why they couldn't eat cookies for dinner too. You would think because I was talking to a 3-year old, that I could come up with one of those responses that would give her a quick answer so she could go back to eating. But I realized that they were paying attention to me way more than what I thought. They were questioning my diet... at 1 and 3 years old. At that point, I had no answer. I folded the bag up and put it away. After that, I knew I needed to make a change but had no clue how. My schedule was too crazy to add a workout routine in anywhere. So I did the unthinkable... I got involved more with my kids. We went outside, went for bike rides, walks, to the park, etc. I started cooking more at home and not eating out so much. The weight started to literally fall off. I lost roughly 25lbs before we moved .. again. I was able to take advantage of having friends and family closer and joined Weight Watchers. When all was said and done, I lost about 100lbs.
Weight watchers taught me a lot about healthy habits. This meant good food choices for myself and my kids. So I've incorporated it over the years. Now, after baby #4, I find myself on the same path to losing weight. But I had to correct myself when Kally (now 8) asked me why I was exercising. At 8-years old, you wouldn't think that the word "skinny" is anything but an adjective. It's just a word to describe that girl you want to be. But in the mind of an 8-year old, "skinny" is the new thing to worry about. "Skinny" is what she says about her dad's girlfriend's daughter, and how she thinks she should look. "Skinny" has become a fear.. to a petite below average in height and weight 8-year old. She puts on jeans and asks me if they make her look "skinny." It pisses me right off!
Whoever invented the skinny jeans - shame on you! Think about it. We are putting our toddler-teenage daughters in skinny jeans, and in the same sentence trying to protect them from sexual predators, teach them to be conservative, and not flaunt what god blessed them with. They are skinny jeans! This means, every portion of our daughters is being flaunted through society's skin tight fashion statement. For what? So they are considered to be with the "in" crowd? In this house, we don't do skinny jeans. My girls are required to have some slack in their jeans.. for simple things like kicking a ball or bending over. Not to say you may or may not see them in sparkly skirts and tie-dye tees with winter boots.
Back to Kally's question. I'm not trying to "get skinny." In fact, I know I can't ever be skinny because, damnit I'm not built that way. If you look at my pictures from baby til now, my rear end has always been there, my thighs have always been there, and my boobs came in 4th grade. I'm a big girl and I'm totally okay with it! However, (and this is my response to her question).. I can be healthy. I can exercise everyday to make my heart healthy, stay in the best shape I can be in, alleviate long term disease, and keep me active so I can still be a good mom. Most of all, I can get healthy and have a longer life with my kids. My hope, is they see the choices I'm making and follow in my footsteps. At three years old they were prepared to eat cookies with me for dinner. I have that power and I have to use it.
What I won't do is encourage my girls to be skinny. They don't know this yet but they have been blessed with my "parts" and will have to work hard for how they want to look when they are older. I have to protect them from the pictures and comments that social media portrays. But really all I have to promote is for them to "be healthy." If "skinny" comes from that, so be it. But as a family, we are not working towards it.
To mom's of girls of any age... Promote healthy living instead of society's views on "getting skinny".
